Tuesday, June 29, 2010

The claytons update post.....

.....You know, 'the post that is an update that really isn't an update post.....!'

OK! So I have been a bit slack the last little bit...but that doesn't mean that I haven't been doing anything. (edit - this post started as an update post but ended up a little different - sorry!)

I have, as most of you would know, resigned from my position as an oncology nurse. It was a big decision to make and definately not made in haste (but one has to know when it is time to move on) and it WAS time for me to move on! I would like to say that it was sad to say goodbye, but I didn't really say goodbye - I just up and left.

In leaving, I am taking away many years of very fond memories and saying goodbye to many wonderful collegues. I am also walking away from some of the most inspiring people I know - my patients. To be a part of so many wonderful peoples lives and to have had some impact on them is something that I will treasure forever. Many people have said to me over the years "It must be a sad job" or "You must be an angel, how do you do it?" To them I say it can be sad. There are times where you know that even if you give everything you have, the end result will not be what anyone wants.

There are times where you come home and just want to cry....when the 40 year old woman with breast cancer, with the 1 and 3 year old children dies; when the husband or wife of someone married for 40, 50 and even 60 years dies; when the 50 year old with teenage children dies; when the 21 year old with sarcoma is told they wont see another year; when someone looses a Mother, Father, Brother, Sister, Best friend or anyone they love or worse someone they never told they loved; when a young woman or man is told they will never have children of their own - Yes it is sad!

BUT ....... it can be amazing too!

We often see people as they REALLY are.....we see into their very hearts and souls. If we are lucky enough to be allowed in, we get to know their hopes and dreams, their fears, their regrets, their achievements. We really get to see the love that they have for their families and the love that their families have for them. We get to hold their hand and give them a hug when it seems all hope is lost, sometimes that is all we can do!

Cancer patients have a different way of looking at life, they have taught me to literally not sweat the small stuff. When someone complains about grey hairs I think they are lucky to have hair. When someone is complaining about getting another year older I think it is better than not getting another year older. When my kids are annoying the bejesus out of me, I try to remember I am lucky to be here to witness them growing up.

Another thing to remember is not all cancer patients die! Some actually walk out and never ever have to see us again. To be told by a patient "Thank you - I hope I never see you again" are words that maybe only a oncology nurse/doctor etc. could appreciate! To walk down the street and be greeted by someone with a huge hug and 'Hello Anthea (and you have no idea who I am because I have hair, colour, weight, energy, etc.)' is a wonderful feeling. And when a patient does die - the honour of being by their bedside; often with their family and knowing that you have done everything you can do to make them as comfortable as possible is a feeling that I can not even begin to explain.

To my collegues - most of you are people I will continue to call a friend and I look forward to our future get togethers. To my patients; no - I did not say goodbye, for that I am truly sorry! Please remember though, I will never ever forget you all and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the lessons, laughs and love that you have given me over the past ten years.

May the "Chemo Angel" we made keep watching over you all! ;)


xoxoxox

Monday, June 7, 2010

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Well! Righteo! That was Miss T. having some fun on the computer. She was pretty proud of herself! I had just logged in when a friend arrived and this is what we got when I went to answer the door. Hmmmm - pretty profound if you ask me - she is certainly on a level that I can't reach!

Just thought I would say hi! It has been a while since I have been here and I thought it would be nice to show you all that yes - I am still alive!

We have officially moved into the new house and despite some minor teething pains, we are settling in quite nicely. Tori enjoyed visiting our horse neighbours yesterday and our kangaroo neighbours are also fun to spy on. We have missed the cows a bit as they seem to have been moved to another paddock - I am sure they will be back though!

As of two weeks ago - I am also now a 'lady of leisure'. Still trying to work out what that means. I seriously have not stopped for a second to catch my breath since resigning my position of 7 years. Oh! Yes! Hang on! I lie! I did watch Master Chef last night and the night before!

Scrapping wise I have actually been a bit quiet...but here is some of the stuff that I have done - mostly for the Top50 CC and monthly challenges last month!

This one was for the 'Scrapwhispers' game over at Top50 - if you would like to be a part of the next one - put your name here (you will have to be registered though!) It was a lot of fun and I can honestly say that the first and last LO so far look nothing alike.
This next one was based on the movie poster "Avatar". Yep -it is my cranky pants Matthew.

Now you have all seen this photo before - but being inspired by the latest 'Alice in Wonderland' poster - this is what I came up with! I love how it turned out! BTW - this one actually won me a prize over at Top50. You gotta like that!

This next one was part of the monthly challenges and was set by guest DT member Judith.
Thanks Judith - awesome challenge. This is the first time I have used a banner and I love how it turned out.
This next one was set by Vicki - Love this Vick! Thanks! The journalling is hidden in the tag on the right and basically says how Tori was proud to show off these clothes that were made especially for her.
This next one was a sketch challenge set by the lovely Sue. Another fun LO to do.

Well - that is it for now. Hope everyone is well. I will try to be a more regular blogger, but I aint promising nothing!
Hugs all 'round.
Anthea
xox